BY: Thom Rainer |
You are the new pastor of the
church. Expectations are high on your part and on the members’ part. Perhaps
you celebrate with some type of installation service.
You are ready to lead and move
the church forward. After all, you are the pastor. Right?
Wrong.
In most established churches,
there is a prolonged period before the church members as a whole will truly
embrace you as pastor. When that time comes, most pastors enjoy their greatest
and most joyous years of ministry.
But the majority of pastors
never make it to year five, much less year seven. So why does it take five to
seven years to be embraced as the pastor of most established churches? Here are
seven common reasons.
1. It
takes a long time to break into established relationship patterns. Many
of the members have been around for decades. They have their friends, family
members, and relationship groups. Pastors will not meaningfully enter into many
of those relationships for several years.
2. You
are creating new ways of doing things. You may not think
you are a major change agent, but your presence as the pastor changes things
significantly. You lead differently. You preach differently. Your family is
different. The church has to adjust to all the changes you bring before they
begin to embrace you fully as pastor.
3. Most
relationships do not establish fully until they go through one or two major
conflicts. The first year or two are your honeymoon years. The church
thinks you are absolutely great. Then you do something, lead something, or
change something that goes counter to their expectations. Conflict ensues. You
are no longer the best. So you have two years of honeymoon, one to two years of
conflict, and one to two years to get on the other side of conflict. Then you
become the pastor in five to seven years.
4. The
church is accustomed to short-term pastorates. Many
churches rarely see a pastor make it to the fifth, sixth, or seventh year. They
never fully accept the pastor, because they don’t believe the leader will make
it past the first major conflict.
5.
Previous pastors wounded some church members. There
are many reasons for this reality, some understandable and some not. In either
case, a previous pastor hurt some church members, and the members take several
years to accept a new pastor and learn to trust again.
6.
Trust is cumulative, not immediate. This reality is
especially true in established churches. Regardless of how the ministry
unfolds, it simply takes time before church members are willing to say with
conviction, “That is my pastor.”
I know. I wish we could snap
our fingers and enjoy immediate trust. But, in most churches, it just is not
going to happen quickly. It will take five to seven years.
Are you willing to stick around
to enjoy the fruit of a long-term pastorate?
Dr.
Thom Rainer is president and CEO of LifeWay Christian Resources of the Southern
Baptist Convention.
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