Listening to Others When They Are Dealing With
Change
by Scott Stoner
There is a connection between our capacity to listen to
others’ emotions and the capacity to listen to our own. Referring to the scale
of emotions in yesterday’s reflection, we will find that our capacity to listen
to the “unpleasant” 0-5 emotions of others will be directly related to the
ability to do the same with ourselves.
All of us know people who have suffered more than others
this past year. The pandemic has hit some individuals and groups of people
harder than others. We focused earlier in this devotional on the importance of
listening to our neighbors. Being a faithful listener to our neighbors, those
who have dealt with more than their share of change this year, is perhaps one
of the greatest gifts we can offer them.
As the verse from
Proverbs states, people who are grieving don’t need us to give them answers.
They probably don’t need advice either. What they need is our loving and caring
presence. What they need is for us to be comfortable listening to their grief,
pain, and uncertainty. What they need is for us to be truly interested in
hearing their real response when we ask, “So how are you doing right now?”
There is a
beautiful quote from Henri Nouwen that describes the kind of listening and care
people need from us when they are grieving.
The
friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and
bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing ... that is
a friend who cares.
Making
It Personal:
How comfortable are you in simply listening to another’s
grief or sadness?
Have you been a
friend to someone who has faced a great deal of change during this past year?
Is there someone right now to whom you feel called to
reach out and listen?
Living
Well Through Lent 2021
Copyright
©2021 Scott Stoner.
All
rights reserved.
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