A question started nagging
me after I’d been in ministry a while: Is my Father ever proud of
me?
The question wasn’t rooted
in my past. My folks were always kind and affirming. Actually, it was
Jesus’ own words that weighed heavily on me. In Luke 17:10 he said of
servants, “So you, when you have done everything you were told to do,
should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’” And
Luke 12:48, “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded;
and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be
asked.” I would labor on as faithfully as I could but still I wondered and
yearned for God’s pleasure.
After I’d prayed and worked
hard on a sermon I’d wonder, did Jesus like it? Did he
like how I explained a difficult part or how the conclusion came together?
When I listened well and responded wisely in a counseling session, did he
think, “Nice job”? When I managed my frustrations in a meeting and was kind
instead of abrupt, did he smile with satisfaction? Maybe being proud of me
isn’t the best way to put it, but that’s how it settled in my mind.
These days it hasn’t been
easy for pastors to take much pride in your own work. Perhaps you’ve
watched helplessly as your people fought or as they suffered. Maybe you’ve
wondered if you’ll have anything to show for all your work. A lot of
pastors have never felt so weak or so unfruitful. I remember thinking that
I’d like to hear Jesus say, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” now,
when the uncertainty and inadequacy weighed so heavily on me.
When Paul thanked God for
the Thessalonians he pointed to “your work produced by faith, your labor
prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by our hope in our Lord Jesus
Christ.” There’s no way God heard Paul’s thanksgiving and thought, “Dial it
back, Paul. They’re just servants doing their duty.” And so it is for you,
dear shepherds.
Remember what God told
Samuel, “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look
at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”
It may have taken a
pandemic, but I suspect a lot more pastors are “lowly and contrite in
heart” now than in the past. Such hearts are God’s second home. Shepherds
have had little else left but to focus on simply finding ways to care about
the souls of their weary and wandering sheep. For that, our Good Shepherd
is grateful. When you were wounded by your own congregation you were
sharing in Christ’s suffering and he welcomed your company. Even when your
prayers were frail and frightened the Lord was glad to be sought. When you
took up your Bibles to find your way forward in the fog, the Lord was
pleased. In all these things, the Lord no longer calls us servants, but
friends.
How could one who loves us
so deeply as our Father, who gave his one and only Son to save and
transform us, who dispatched his own Spirit to empower, gift, and teach us,
and who called us to serve his beloved people, how could he not delight
in our earnest work for Jesus? If we, being sinful, delight in seeing our
children at their best, how could our Father not be proud of us?
Be ye glad!
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